Dancing With Depression - Gene Kelly's Alter Ego Dance

I found this thanks to Operation Tap's Gene Kelly week on Facebook back in August. I had never even heard of it before.

1944. The height of World War II. PTSD is barely an acknowledged mental condition at this point, never mind depression. Yet Gene Kelly -- whether he intended to or not -- personifies the condition with more accuracy than thousands and thousands of modern dances for fundraisers ever have, even after depression started to be recognised as a legitimate mental illness. (I say this as a longtime sufferer.)

It's all here -- the whispers, the dark lonely alley, the feeble hopes, the self-hatred, the fear in his eyes, the tension in his shoulders, the careful drawing of breath, the double reeling him backwards on an invisible string, the double leading the dance -- controlling him, trying to wrestle it down but unable to get a hold of it...

It's the doppelgänger from the ¡Alarma! Chronicles stories. It's the ghost of the heart (wait, that's still ¡Alarma! Chronicles...). It's the Identical Twins, Paul's war on his own sinful flesh.

Words fail me. But this dance... it touched me. Very, very few dances do. But this was one of them (the others are Astaire and Charisse's Dancing In The Dark and Kelly and Astaire's The Babbitt And The Bromide).

Watch. Breathe. Don't focus -- not yet -- on the fact that it's 1944 and everything is rationed and money is tight yet Gene Kelly manages to film a dance with himself. Do that later. Watch the story, the feelings.

Title: Alter Ego Dance
Artist: Gene Kelly
Film: Cover Girl
Year: 1944
Columbia Pictures.
Watch here.

Even the very end illuminates how depression works (SPOILERS) -- he takes a trash can and throws it at the double in a last-ditch attempt to destroy it. It disappears, but there is shattered glass in its wake. (And how long is it really gone?)

Likewise, depression can be beaten -- but only temporarily, and often at a price. And the shattered glass left around us when we've managed to win one fistfight often sends us farther down into the dark alley, wondering why there isn't a way to beat this thing without completely destroying ourselves. Sometimes the trash can is alcohol. Sometimes it's drugs. Sometimes it's food. Sometimes it's suicide. But there are always pieces to pick up. It never just 'goes away.'

Reeling...

I don't know what to say. My heart is heavy as I type.

We are now under a Nazi government.

Start a firestorm in the comments if you like, but you mark my words. If nothing changes, if God sees fit to leave us as Albertans in our depravity... I shudder at the thought. They have clearly stated that they will indoctrinate our children (can you say 'Hitler youth'?) and those children will grow up to lead our country in thirty years.

How shall they lead a country when all they have been taught -- all they will ever know -- are the perverted whims of a power-hungry, family-destroying, disrespectful government?

In fact, even now it is happening. I see this indoctrination in otherwise very intelligent and rational people.

The enemy does not lie in wait at our door anymore, he is already inside.

And yet we sleep...



Please, Christian brothers and sisters around the world, pray for us. We who see what's coming are despondent today -- speechless. This is a terrible blow. We are disillusioned and weakened by the shock and yet in the near future we will have to fight harder than I think any of us alive today have ever fought to hang on to our freedom. Please pray for our government to be transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit, that we will be strong in the face of what appears to be swift and inevitable persecution, and especially that we would be faithful in praying for you as you have and will so lovingly pray for us.

Music Day -- And An Urgent Request

(I had a different Music Day post all ready -- complete with pictures and everything. I spent more than five hours on the stupid thing. Oh wait, heaven forbid Blogger can just put one line of text right underneath the picture, not ten tab-returns below it or beside it. So now I guess you can just read part of the text because I refuse to blow the rest of my sleeping night swearing at Blogger. I might post the pictures part later when Blogger decides it has a brain behind its operation.)

Anyway.

(*painstakingly pieced together photo montage with scary-appropriate captions that won't work goes here*)







 

The government of Alberta is taking measures to censor Christianity and erase all moral and ethical code.

In fact, it's not just Alberta. Ontario has already passed similar legislation and I think at least two other provinces have done the same. This is going to sweep Canada unless the body of Christ suits up and comes to fight. This is clearly the work of Satan, trying to make sure the future generations of Canada will not ever get the chance to hear of the just, merciful, loving, holy, majestic God who created them.

Please pray this will not come to pass. That the church of Alberta will rise up and protest -- with love and respect, but also firmly.

And we need your help now. Yes, yours.

Whether or not you homeschool your children, whether or not you even have any children, whether or not you live in Canada, whether or not you're a Christian, today is your day to speak up.

I post this at approximately 2.00 am Mountain Standard Time on the ninth of March. Two of the legal representatives of homeschooling in Canada have declared the ninth of March as a day when the pressure on the Canadian government is turned up -- substantially.

They -- we -- are asking that everyone who is concerned about this, no matter for what reason or where they live, to contact the Premier of Alberta or the Minister of Education today and respectfully make their opinions known. There has already been a phoning and letter-writing blitz going on this week, but it's only been amongst Albertans. Since the Premier and the Minister of Education continue to push for this legislation with alarming determination, we are inviting Canada, North America, the world, to join us.

I'll be posting some links below that outline the specific situation. Suffice to say, if this legislation gets passed, all I can see is Nazi Germany all over again. One of the governmental higher-ups was even quoted as saying, "(Whatever the nature of schooling -- homeschooling, private school, Catholic school -- ) we do not tolerate disrespect for differences." (Emphasis mine.)

Of course the statement was later 'retracted,' but if that doesn't sound like Hitler, I don't know what does.

Please pray. The freedom of Alberta, indeed of Canada as a whole, hangs in the balance. Not just for Christians, but for everyone who doesn't fit the 'Aryan' mould our government clearly intends to impose on us.

Now for the song (I had a nice segway here but it wouldn't have made sense without the pictures).

The other day on the commute from dance, while listening to the ShufflePod (as I call it now -- the iPod nano I listen to on shuffle), this track came on. And immediately I thought of music day.

So here it is.

Title: WAR

'Artist': John Piper

Year: 2007

Listen to and download the free MP3 here. YouTube here.

I'll let the track speak for itself... all I can say is it's powerful.

Again, please help us put pressure on the Alberta government to retract the changes to Bill 2. Whether you pray for the softening of hearts or you actually make a phone call or send an email, I as a homeschool graduate, a Canadian, and a Christian, on behalf of my Christian homeschooling parents, my Christian homeschooled siblings, and all my Christian homeschooled friends, thank you in advance.

Contact information:

Honourable Thomas Lukaszuk, Education Minister

423 Legislature Building
10800 - 97 Avenue NW
Edmonton, AB
Canada T5K 2B6
Phone: (780) 427-5010
Fax: (780) 427-5018
edmonton.castledowns(at)assembly.ab.ca

Premier Alison Redford

Office of the Premier
Room 307, Legislature Building
10800-97 Avenue
Edmonton, Alberta T5K 2B7
Phone: 780-427-2711 (ask to be connected with the Premier’s Office)
E-mail: Use this form.

Links explaining the details of the situation:

http://www.hslda.ca/blog

http://www.aheaonline.com/

Both pages also contain links to other very informative articles.

Music Day

Remembrance Day.

It's hard to do music day on Remembrance Day. The only song I can think of that might possibly be suitable also happens to be one I absolutely cannot stand anymore.

So today's song is not explicitly related to Remembrance Day, but it makes me think of people who've lost family members, be it to natural causes or death in war.

I feel like I can't really say anything that'll do justice to those who have fought. I personally don't have any family members who have served in any wars (at least, none that I'm aware of). My grandfathers were both too young to serve in World War II. But I'm very glad there were others, other future grandfathers and grandmothers, who went and fought to make sure my country didn't lose the freedom it was built on.

Photo by Kate

Don't just remember them today, remember them always, every day.

And now for the song.

Title: Light A Candle
Artist: Avalon
Album: Joy
Year: 2000
Label: Sparrow Records
iTunes here; YouTube here.

Light a candle
For the old man who sits staring
Out a frosty windowpane
Light a candle
For the woman who is lonely
And every Christmas it's the same
For the children who need more than presents can bring...