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 29 things I've learned about myself:

1. At age twelve I theorised that my brain and my ears processed spoken words more slowly than other people and this was why I could never keep up with conversations. Over ten years later I learned that that's a real thing (called auditory processing disorder) and I have it.

2. I find writing novels much, MUCH easier than writing short stories. In fact, the more condensed the medium, the more I struggle with it.

3. I do my best artistic work either as a passenger in a vehicle or alone in a darkened room between 11pm and 2am.

4. At age seven I decided I wanted to be a choreographer. I didn't even know what the name for it was yet, but I knew I wanted to make dances. In the twenty-two years since then, nobody has been able to convince me otherwise. (In other words: if you're on a mission to talk me out of it... just give up. Save yourself the hassle.)

5. I still accidentally tell people I can't read music even though I totally can. I just couldn't for so long that I forget that I've learned now.

6. I would rather live in -40 year-round than plus 24 or higher for more than two days. This opinion becomes stronger every day. I become completely nonfunctional if the temperature is over 23 degrees.

7. I am very passionate about art, specifically integrity within art. If you don't like it, leave; because I'm not dialling it back.

8. Eating chicken can be an okay (rather than terrifying) experience, but ONLY if my husband prepares it.

9. By age four, I had chosen what would be my favourite potato chip flavour for apparently the rest of my life. And I am very much a snob about different brands.

10. I love '80s keyboards. The more '80s keyboards/synths a song has, the more likely I am to like it.

11. The people who call me 'stubborn' are generally the people who are mad that I'm not putty in their hands. (After years of having my identity shaped for me by people in authority, I'm forging my own and I don't take requests from just anybody.)

12. My favourite books are Perelandra by C.S. Lewis and Murder Must Advertise by Dorothy Sayers. Both books are art in every sense of the word and have inspired some of my own works.

13. I have been loyal to Papermate pens since my early teens. I also very much prefer having capped pens rather than clicker pens (I like the weight of the cap on the end while I'm writing).

14. I hate cooking. I would literally rather starve than cook. There is literally nothing I even remotely like about being in the kitchen for any length of time.

15. I really don't enjoy food/eating. I don't understand it when people talk about food as a source of pleasure. To me, eating is a necessary evil that takes up valuable time and energy that I could be devoting to my art.

16. I think and talk about death a lot. I don't see this as morbid or wrong. It's simply a part of existence and I don't understand why people avoid the topic so much. It's the one thing all of humankind has in common. Death is something that touches us all sooner or later, and it's been a huge part of my life so far. It's shaped who I am as a person and as an artist. To ignore it is to ignore what makes me who I am.

17. I HATE toxic positivity. It's a form of gaslighting... which is manipulation... which is abuse.

18. I also hate sleeping. Just lie there unconscious and unmoving for eight hours? What a colossal waste of time. Do you know how much art I could get done in eight hours? Sleep feels useless and dumb to me. This is also why I never take naps, no matter how tired I am.

19. I really wish I could draw. I mean, I can draw okay. But I can never think of anything to draw.

20. I am honest to a fault. About EVERYTHING. If you don't like it/can't handle it, get out of my life. And I mean that.

21. I never expected to live this long, let alone get married. And I'm not quite sure what to do with myself now. I never prepared for this.

22. If I could pick an age to be stuck at, it would probably be age nineteen. I was dancing almost full-time, choreographing for my friend's dance team, gainfully employed at a flexible well-paying job that I really enjoyed, on good terms with my church at the time... there was literally nothing wrong with my life when I was nineteen.

23. The first time I ever remember hearing about Jesus was when I 'accidentally' read Mark's account of Jesus raising Jairus' daughter from the dead when I was about four or five. I had heard of Jesus in Sunday School, but I'd never heard of Him doing anything like that in the Sunday School lessons. Maybe this was why I got so angry and felt so betrayed when my young cousin died... and was not raised back to life.

24. I wanted to be a dancer before I even knew what it was called. I have no memory of seeing a dance performance and thinking, 'I want to do that.' We had no TV and my parents never went to the theatre. I don't know how I knew dance existed. But I wanted it so badly I begged my parents for lessons for over a year before they relented. I point to this internal 'knowing' as one of the signs that this is my calling.

25. Sunset/dusk/night have always been my favourite times of day. That's when all the inspiration is born.

26. I feel alive when I'm near trees, in the country with emerald-green grass and pink and orange sunsets.

27. If you overplay a song -- no matter how good it is or how much I like it -- I will hate that song for the rest of my life. This is the reason I absolutely despise Bohemian Rhapsody. I do not care how clever or well-sung or well-crafted it is. I have heard it approximately eight million times in my life and nobody should ever have to listen to ANYTHING that many times. I loathe that song. Same goes for the Frozen soundtrack.

28. To me, 'luxury' is having a fireplace in your house. Even (especially?) if it's a gas fireplace.

29. I see myself as a joyful, positive person overall. My journals are consistently filled with joy, ideas, possibilities, and hope. Maybe that's why it hurts SO deeply when people rail against me for being 'too negative.'